{ split subject }

i. I forgot to commemorate my eljayversary! it's june 11. apparently I didn't celebrate last year either, so, no memes here. but still, I love you lj!

ii. over the past three days I undertook a semi-massive redesign of my fanfic empire. baby pink is now chartreuse, purple is now darker purple, brighter and less cloying, everything matches projectjulie.net, and I'm SO much happier. even *I* get sick of pink sometimes. this was perhaps not my finest hour in time management, but the project was on the list so I was bound to do it imminently in the course of my procrastination, anyway.

in addition to converting my color scheme, I indexed all my fanstuff in del.icio.us (which took FOREVER -- but it was worth it). I would HIGHLY recommend this system to anyone who has to maintain a fic index! you get a front end for easily adding things, and then this doohicky enables you to dump the lists automatically into your own pages (my example). (NB: this won't work within LJ, because it doesn't allow javascript.) so I now know some interesting statistics:

- I've written more stories than I thought -- 16 (with 3 more to come this year)
- my remixthedrabble entry was my 50th drabble! *confetti*
- between writing it and making other people write it, I have personally generated a LOT of doppelcest
- I really am more obsessed with BSG than with anything ever

- most importantly: I think I've missed some presents, oh noes! normally I'm pretty OCD about filing them, but I feel like I've been leaving a fair number of meme prompts lately, and I can't imagine nobody has gifted me anything since Five Things went around last fall (oh wait, michellek's commentfic!). if you remember writing me something in the recent past, however tiny (or EVER writing me anything that isn't on this list), PLEASE PLEASE give a shout! since I make every attempt to delegate ideas before I break down and write them myself, presents are an especially important part of my fanfic life.

I also customized cyborganize to look like the drupal site. next up: converting ALL my old fanfic and personal links to del.icio.us. I'll leave that till a future bout of procrastination.

iii. while I was happy not to be overscheduled during my whirlwind visit to new york, in retrospect I could have been a more aggressive planner. I missed about three close friends in ways that were probably avoidable, and I'm so sad about that. not to mention all the folks I didn't even have time to contact! nonetheless, I was overjoyed to catch up with T, girlboymusic + furies (during her brief wakefulness -- wish it had worked out for longer!), D + LC, katia, thenewhope + quasiradiant, and bounce_n_jiggle + nerd_dog.

I'm coming to the realization that I have an abnormally large number of friends. I'm not sure how to talk about that without sounding self-aggrandizing -- just, it's a constant struggle to maintain my relationships with all these people who I dearly love. at some point in life my strategies in this department may have to radically change. for the moment, I'm thinking about my holiday cards.

relatedly, I'm zipping through my flist right now (catching up once more) and I feel like I'm not commenting much. but believe me when I say that I'm the most obsessive-compulsive lj-er ever, and if you're on it that means I'm reading your posts avidly. if I'm forced to filter or defriend again I'll let you know.

iv. july 1, folks!! now's a good time to start watching majoritython for news about my shenanigans in and around la casa shoemoney (especially concerning one very special inhabitant) and its virtual environs. does anyone in LA want to take me or let me take them to a yoga class once a week?

v. I'm posting Big Love prompts at sisterwives. if you've ever had any inclination to slash that show, please do so now! and if you're not watching it, get on that asap!

plus, I just added a bunch of stuff to my femslash fanvids playlist. help me find more on imeem!

( imeem playlist )

i. I'm DONE with school (as of last friday). no more pencils, no more books (most importantly, no more GR4D1NG) for the next year (probably two) of fellowship funding. bring it on.

ii. clyde_man landed hir dream job. it's in D.C., with a far hipper company than these financial drones she's been stuck with for 20 years. this is, seriously, beyond our wildest expectations of what could come of leaving the previous clusterfuck. like kismet. but much as I said I was ready, much as this scenario makes everything far less complicated, it never seemed like leaving NY(J)C was a realistic possibility. and now, all of a sudden, it's happening. we're driving to Jersey tomorrow to pack up my stuff there and say goodbye. tuesday we're continuing on to Providence. I know it's short notice, but if anyone wants to take a ride on the PATH train to hang out with us tomorrow night, you're welcome. dinner at Sushi Tango! tea and ice cream!

iii. as soon as this iron went into the fire, I realized that NYC had been a major oversight in my summer planning. I mean, I subliminally expected that I'd be returning to the city when I leave LA at an undetermined date in august. eep! so now I'm going to try to squeeze in a visit from june 10-14, approximately. I have a plane ticket from Providence to Michigan for june 15, which in retrospect is a terrible arrangement (I could have flown from Newark, and stayed longer!). but now I'm stuck with it. so this will be a whirlwind trip devoted entirely to catching up with friends -- pencil me in, stay tuned, give a shout, etc.

iv. the rest of the schedule: clyde will be in Providence helping me pack until friday. memorial day weekend I'm visiting my grandparents. then lucky (clyde's partner!) is coming to town to finish up the packing and help with the move itself on june 2, because clyde will have started the new job (and can't carry things with hir bad back anyway). this intra-familial delegation was her idea -- so adorable! we are completely Bill and Barb and Margie.

v. apparently lucky and clyde are going to Burning Man at the end of august: anybody interested in taking me? and the boston dyke march is on june 8 (6pm) -- be there or be square!

vi. I have no number vi. mostly just my perpetual battle with time, how unlimited projects lie in wait for me inside my computer and out there in the world. I don't seem to be able to prevent myself (especially while grading, writing) from joining ficathons and redesigning layouts and playing with new gadgets (that's a "lifestream": one-stop shopping for everything I post everywhere [excluding fanfic]). speaking of which, if you've joined twitter and I haven't added you yet, give me a holler.

vii. there was a moment, as I schlepped through the Denver airport, when the architecture of taking a break from lj was actually comprehensible. I know, intellectually, that my current involvement in fandom and internet life isn't sustainable long term, but most of the time the prospect of not participating at this level seems unimaginable. lj has been a source of so much stress and anxiety for me in recent months, though, and in that brief flash in transit I could SEE the relief (of a drastic unfriending and a break from fanfic) stretching before me. writing my diss about fandom creates a sort of hilarious catch 22, however, because I can't very well de-engage with my object of study! a year from now, when I'll have hopefully finished my case studies, I'm going to re-evaluate my status.

viii. speaking of fandom stress, I followed thassalia into the fray at Denis McGrath's blog. why did I do that?? he's a friend of FL, so I suppose I felt some responsibility to raise the level of debate. anyway, my comments (down at the bottom) are clearly informed by recent MiT5-y conversations with theorynut, cathexys, et al. go team acafangirl! I had this realization, by the way, that the reason I'm not blogging publicly and making myself visible like the fanboys is that I'd rather devote that energy to WRITING FIC.

ix. the girls of Shoemoney Haus are living three of my alternate lives, and it just fills me with flaily pride. I hate that I've been away since january.

x. that meme: I asked for icons and interests from the first five folks to cross my flist. shout if you want me to pick for you!

for, in order, ana_grrl, pocketwitch, annakovsky, tellitslant, and wearemany:

( words & squares )

it's a little island halfway between lower Manhattan and Red Hook (Brooklyn).

here it is from the ferry with the Statue of Liberty in the background:


( x11! )

change of plans, kids.

a) I'm leaving NYC on sunday morning, instead of wednesday or thursday as planned, so I can spend 20 or so precious hours with iamsab in the bucolic land of central MA
b) after that it goes: a week in Boston (finishing of field lists), 4 days in Providence, weekend in Provincetown, 4 days in Connecticut (writing of Cain), weekend in Portland ME
c) and then, never fear, I'm coming back to the city for most of the first two weeks of august
d) then I'm going to Michigan/Toronto/Montreal
e) then school starts!

so because I pushed the date back, I've made about 8 separate plans with friends for the next two days. apparently I have an unusually high number of friends. today = lunch with surblimity, visiting Tekserve, hopefully a chat with theholyinnocent (I'll call!), and then nerd_dog's birthday party! tomorrow = lunch with SA, hopefully D+LC and E in the afternoon, and then clyde_man and I are seeing Cars (or X3).

I promised I would because last night s/he went with me to see The Devil Wears Prada, aka Smart People Excel at Stupid Jobs, aka The Movie That Was Created for aeonian. we were supposed to see Cars but clyde saw the poster and said "oh I want to see, that, I love Meryl Streep," and I said "eeeeee, I didn't even think to ask if you'd go with me, because it's a chick flick" -- so it's not like s/he wasn't warned. clyde hated it, of course. I thought it was a pretty lame movie, but the monumental gay more than compensated for the lameness! Meryl Streep was absurdly hot. I would have preferred someone a bit more pre-gayed than Anne Hathaway, but I can work with what I'm given. how much do we want Miranda/Andrea, now? can't you just picture Miranda ordering Andy to fuck her in the same imperious voice she uses to order her to do everything?!? well never fear, the brain trust has come through for you! aeonian wrote Bare and quasiradiant wrote Ravenous, plus jennyo wrote Discreet Lesbian Chic.

really, the fireworks femslash porn battle was THE BOMB!!! here are my prompts with links to prezzies -- plus there are some other gems (Facts of Life! Bones! Ziva/Miss Parker!), but it's going to take me forever to get through the masterlist and I don't have time to rec beyond this. go forth and read!

( an embarrasment of riches )

clyde_man and I have been arguing talking about moving one stop further out on the PATH train to a neighborhood called Journal Square. it's almost equally convenient to the city, and not TOO far by walking or shuttle bus or bike to the downtown JC neighborhood we know and love. property is MUCH cheaper. and it's a neat little spot, very diverse (not fully yuppified like the places I'm living now [not that I don't secretly love that]) and oddly sliced up by trains and highways, with quaint residential streets tucked away between its gritty thoroughfares. see:



we went there today to scope it out. here's a map (that house is at ref. 1), which overlaps slightly with my earlier map so you can understand it in relation to where we live now (and for fun, an area map).

when you get off the PATH train, you see:

( +12 pics )

I was at a party from 4-10:30 p.m. yesterday :)

it started out as the department BBQ, and then became visiting the kitties, and then turned into drinks at the Grad Center Bar, and ended up with dogs and fries at Spike's.

it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that it's taken me two years to adjust to and accept not living in new york city. that was my first (and possibly only) experience creating an adult community for myself outside the ready-made structure of an academic institution, and it was challenging and at times painful and ultimately hugely rewarding. so there was a LOT of attachment and inertia there. but my strategy thus far, DENIAL, is feeling increasing untenable. pretending that I still live in nyc means that when I'm there I work (which is my life, after all). meanwhile, in reality I'm not there enough to be on everyone's regular-hanging-out circuit -- instead it's this long list of people who I try to squeeze in once a year, checking them off like a series of tasks (with a few exceptions among my closest friends). I don't like that. this summer, I started thinking that I might actually enjoy the city more as a visitor, one who can send "hey I'm coming to town for a week" emails and do a whirlwind tour sometime when I can take a break from homework.

I gave a lot of thought this summer to where I want to be in a year, when I'm done with my coursework. some people, usually those with partners in other places, pack up and move once they're ABD. but I don't know if I'm prepared to give up my community at school. new york is nearly 4 hours away and thus not practically commutable.

boston is commutable, though -- at least in theory -- and with happyhop (BFF!!1!oneelventy!!) and other close friends there now it's suddenly much more appealing. happyhop is the only person other than clyde_man who I'm eager to make a life with, and (my joking about her being the mother of my children aside) I could totally see us as partners in 10 years if she doesn't manage to trick a man into marrying her. I thought about forcing her to move to providence, but I know she has virginia PTSD and needs to be in the big city for a while.

now, clyde_man is the stumbling block in all this -- because what I want MOST is to make a life with hir. I know s/he feels connected to nyc, at this point, something I can certainly sympathize with, and I don't want to ask hir to give that up. on the other hand, I would LOVE if s/he found a job in Boston (which is perhaps a longshot). I'm not sure where we'd live -- Boston is really too expensive to buy and Providence is not the easiest commute and I don't know if I'd want to do the burbs (but maybe I could get used to that idea). and I'd have to convince hir to live with my future doggie, only one of many hurdles. but, yeah. if she doesn't move that probably means we'll be long distance till I finish in (hopefully) 3 more years (though ideally I can split my time more evenly), at which point I'll likely move back to nyc.

have I mentioned my two three criteria for a livable city?
• good public transportation (by which I don't mean busses, which confuse me)
• some modicum of a queer/lesbian scene and leather scene, including email newsletter(s) that will tell me when the cool events are
• a major body of water -- I love the water

providence has none of these things (technically it's on the bay, I think, but I've never actually seen it). but -- and here's my point -- all these thoughts of moving away went right out the window as soon as I got back here.

I made up this whole metaphor about our departmental family: phil and mary ann are the symbolic dad and mom, marc and I are the twins, the second-years are the triplets and this year's new crop are the quintuplets (yuri is adopted). everyone has been interrogating me about it, and maybe there's some deep Freudian explanation, but really I came up with it because this is just how I feel. there's something rare and precious about a true academic community, about a group of intellectual peers who are sharing an intense experience and supporting each others' projects, and it's different from how it happened in college but just as valuable. I don't know if I want to give up being surrounded by that just so I can have more sex live in a city. the quintuplets (3 girls and 2 boys) are adorable, you can't even imagine, and I want to be here to watch them grow up.

these are the people I was partying with for 6 hours yesterday :)
for the record, though, we won't be partying much after this week.

one of our wonderful office ladies told me that I look "more mature." I didn't know such things could show on the outside, but I'm gratified that they do. I've certainly remarked on the difference, myself, as has mom and others. it was a good summer.

now, while I'm here, I bring you the biannual schedule post:

( Read more... )

also, from sebsan8:

California Gov[ernator] Schwarzenegger's office is accepting calls from anywhere regarding their marriage equality bill. it's passed in their senate and with state representatives, but needs the Gov[ernator]'s approval.

It's all automated, you don't have to talk to anyone.

Call the Govern[at]or: 916-445-2841
push: 2
push: 1
and push: 1 to support marriage equality.

I called. but I've entirely stopped signing political online petitions. is this bad of me? it's just that I get multiple emails about them every day, and given how many there are I'm just not convinced they accomplish anything. and in my busy life I can save the time of reading them and loading them and filling them out if I just ignore them. *feels horribly guilty*

and while I'm on the subject of politics, here's a site that lists LOCAL charities that you can give $$ to, to avoid questionable ntl. orgs like the Red Cross and Salvation Army: http://katrina.mayfirst.org

thanks to aqua_blurr, I think, I'm now getting my Daily Show here / from onegoodmove_syn

I'm watching a girl-on-girl ep of Date My Mom. I love when they do that. I wanna be on a reality dating show!

today's my last day of beginning-of-semester puttering, seriously. I've pretty much whipped the list into submission. over the weekend I'm working on my paper.

and we had dinner with theholyinnocent!! I forgot to take a picture, oh noes! but it really happened, I swear. we were very excited because it was basically the entire MAULITA faction, united in one restaurant! what are the odds?? they are both brilliant.

so now that I finished spamming you with coney island pix, I'm going to delete those posts and repost them here as an all-in-one:

aeonian + I @ coney island!


( more coney island )

so *this* is my last post before I leave, scouts honor. I'm really supposed to be finishing up some things at the moment. but,

1. when I was having dinner with sebsan8 last week, discussing the rather ambitious number of fic projects I've taken on this summer, I decided to take a Pledge. I shall call it the NO MORE BUNNIES Pledge. plot bunnies, that is. because, while it is all well and good that I've made writing fanfic my priority for these rare months of vacation, life probably shouldn't (and indeed, can't) continue like this. at some point in the not too distant future I should really make getting some papers revised and published my main project, or starting on my fields, or even writing original fic. but I keep coming up with new and irresistible ideas. I simply must put a stop to this. and this is not entirely implausible, as I was already on fandom hiatus once before, for several years. so other than the stories on my list for this summer (6), and the ones already on my long term to-do list, I hereby pledge that I will not commit to any more fanfic projects of longer than drabble length.

( deliver me from temptation )

2. more kayaking pictures! if you are living in or visiting nyc, you seriously must go kayaking this summer. it's FREE! here's the official information (I've only been to the pier 26 location, not 72nd st.). things to know:

• yeah, it sounds lame, only being out for 20 min. and having to stay in the protected area. but the protected area really isn't that small. and you can always go more than once if the line isn't too long. it's really really fun!
• you will be sitting in a pool of water, so bring dry bottoms and wear/bring shoes that can get wet. you'll also want to bring a lock so you can leave your stuff in a locker. remember to wear sunscreen and bring water to drink.
• I recommend leaving time to get a bbq burger afterwards at pier 25 -- which also features mini golf, bike rentals, and batting cages (none of which are free, alas). it's also near the lovely battery park.

3. yet again, I wish I were Canadian. that's via Tristan. who also informs me that 36C and 34D bra sizes are identical -- does this make any sense to you?? she says VIctoria's Secret told her, and I guess they should know. eta: isilya says it's true! "A quick explanation: cup sizes go down as rib sizes go up. A 32D, a 34C, and a 36B all have the same cup size, but the rib (or "band") sizes are very different. This means, for example, that all those cup sizes will have diameters of 5 inches, but that the rib sizes and shoulder straps will greatly vary." she recommends wearing the largest cup size (and hence smallest rib size) that fits for best support. also, while I'm here, don't you want to be one of the cool kids?

4. went on a highly productive online shopping spree for clyde_man's birthday/father's day/general appreciation presents yesterday, woohoo! got ( cut because even though s/he was consulted about all of these, s/he now forgets what I ordered and wants to be surprised ) hurrah! clyde pays the rent, buys the groceries, cooks, and cleans the house, and I do the dishes and laundry -- pretty good deal, no?

5. I had a dream that mandysbitch, mazily, michellek and I were all hanging out. each of us was coincidentally wearing something rainbow-colored, and I was excited to take a picture of us with my cameraphone and blog it :)

also, ( the book meme )

1. it's mind-boggling how much time I can spend sitting in front of the internet. I imagine I could spend, say, a two-week retreat in a proverbial (wired) cabin in the woods just doing all the puttering I'll never actually get to outside of fantasy-land. just for the record (and because I fetishize lists), here are the projects I would someday accomplish online, in a perfect world:

( etc. )

2. the above list does not include fic writing -- which is of course my #3 priority this summer (after papers and traveling). Die J/C Die is happening again, hurrah! so I should try to work a J/C breakup into my Janeway opus so that I can submit it. even more exciting is the BSG slash frackufest! since I was already planning to write BSG, I signed up -- you should have no trouble guessing which challenge I grabbed. come play!

3. also today I ordered gay!books for summer reading so I can finally quit the club: Djuna Barnes, cheeeeezy romance, porn star portraits, exercise! [eta: this package never showed up -- drat]. and I posted my fandom lecture notes.

4. aaaand various friends and acquaintances are always sending me nyc apartment queries, but I can never keep track of them. so I made a board. obviously this is no craigslist, but it will help me make myself useful, at least. if you are currently looking for or getting rid of an apartment, remind me so I can list it. or better yet -- post yourself. you can now login to projectjulie.net with your LJ username (as yourljname@livejournal.com) and password. eta: if you're interested but don't want to subscribe to projectjulie.net automatic email updates, here's an LJ feed of available apartments that come my way: pj_nycapts

5. I suspect that some of you will appreciate dirtygirl_icons (see sample above). in return, could you YSI-me the infamous felicity/marcia makeout clip if you have it?? as I'm late on the flist I missed out on the first round of sharing. in conclusion, http://www.gender-news.com (via warlordkittens) is, ahem, "A Ministry of the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood." not quite as impressive as http://lesbianstudies.com and http://www.savethemales.ca, though. and don't forget, http://godhatesshrimp.com.