{ split subject }

projectjulie has suffered for quite some time from a lack of attention and a profound incoherence in its purpose and audience. I never much wanted a blog, or even an online journal, and if dipped my toe into such waters it was mostly incidental. what I want is a hub and an archive, a nexus for all the people and things to which I'm connected. so I'm making it official: this LJ is now merely a clearinghouse and a placeholder (akin to a "digital lifestyle aggregator," in web2.0-speak). I'll continue moblogging pix and tweets here (twitter, it turns out, is exactly the microscopic and immediate degree of blogging that engages me). in other words: nothing much has changed vis å vis the dearth of meaningful content, except that comments are turned back ON for mobile posts, since I plan for those to be the only ones (or perhaps I'll still make flocked entries once in a while, we shall see).

what I've loved most about lj, as an interface, is its capacity to foster and nurture intimacy across time and space. but, as in all things, we reap what we sow, and these days I'm not expending the effort to make it fulfilling for this purpose. this is an inevitable side-effect of being a dissertator: in order to finish my PhD, which is monastic and all-consuming, I have to learn to be a worse friend. all I can say is that it's painful, but necessary.

CONTENT
- my diss and other updates about my academic progress and accomplishments remain at cyborganize
- after adamantly resisting for years, I'm suddenly quite taken with Facebook, and am exploring how to make it as comprehensive a nerve center as possible for my personal and professional presence
- and to reiterate the sidebar links (and then some), you can also find me on www, ourchart, friendster, imeem, youtube, bliptv, flickr, delicious (fannish/personal/professional), gcal, plazes, librarything -- or all of these aggregated at profilactic (or jaiku)

FRIENDS
- I've done some defriending -- let me reiterate that I have affection for all of you, and this move is wholly motivated by my regrettable need to pare down my online life
- by the same token, I'm extending unfriending amnesty: if you'd like to remove me now, especially given the devolution this journal, please feel free to do so, with no hard feelings
- I remain committed to reading my flist and everyone on it faithfully, though you'll have to continue to forgive my minimal commenting
- I still have a lot of long-term catch-up reading to do, mostly fic, which may or may not ever happen

( FANDOM )

[this post will be future-dated]

i. this primary season has been painful (even though so far I've avoided voting, since I'm registered in Michigan). I've been at a loss for how to engage or respond or even articulate the crippling double-binds. so because fandom is my orientation and my native language:

deborah_judge and I (egged on by iamsab) are thrilled to present: majoritython, the women and people of color in politics challenge! we hope that this 'thon, for fanworks featuring fictional characters and real people who rule or govern or hold civil office, will redress in some small way the negativity and divisiveness, sexism and racism currently stirred up around people of color and women in power.

you can read all about Majority Rules here. this is right up the alley of plenty of folks on my flist (you know who you are), and I WANT YOU to participate. even if you aren't able to sign-up, you can contribute by trying your hand at some creative googling and inventing prompts. and by PIMPING, pretty please?! this has the potential to reach a vast number of fandoms, but only if we have help spreading the word (I've got chamalla_dreams, cj_fangrrl, and rpfs covered -- choc_fic or vidding, anyone?).

my condition for myself when committing to running this, time-management wise, was that I wasn't allowed to submit. but then I accidentally listened to a song. yeah, I may very well have signed up to make my 1st vid (though whether I'll actually finish it is another matter altogether). SHUT UP. it's a movie vid (of complete crack). I may very well have it story-boarded and meta-noted in my head. like my 0th vid, it may be something that nobody else is ever able to love a fraction as much as I do.

ii. in other news that's fit to print: I am creeping toward mental, emotional, and spiritual preparedness for the BSG premiere. inspiration has struck about my S4 project: for each episode, I plan to create some document or artifact (in keeping with the archival theme) that inserts the GIRLSLASH GOGGLES into the narrative. please send any ideas or requests by way of thearchive2.

iii. if you're feeling only a small fraction of the love I'm feeling for fandom right now (or, you know, the frustration with livejournal), consider making a small donation to become a member of the Organization for Transformative Works. OTW is building the next great home for fanworks, a not-for-profit archive with an infrastructure that supports and protects our values.

iv. the computer store gave Pythia back, all "your drive passed the hardware test." I figured my troubleshooting skills had gotten rusty. then I got her home and, yup, the hard drive is indeed still broken. so today it's back to the shop (I explained to them about writing zeros, and my poor baby made the crunching/clicking sound on cue). although rather lobotomized without it, I'm in good spirits, all things considered -- poojapooja saved what little sanity I have left by loaning me her old Vaio. and I get a new keyboard/top case out of the whole affair, and possibly Leopard, and the new memory I bought is installed, so in a few more days it will be practically like having a whole new lappy!

while I'm on the subject of technology: what platform would you recommend for an academic who needs to create a multimedia portfolio in a user-friendly fashion? blog architecture is not really flexible enough to create an archive that includes text, films, etc. there must be some social media site that offers CMS-style functionality in a web 2.0 front-end, while being more professionally-oriented than the likes of Vox or Nexo and shinier than ourmedia?

v. the photo meme (again): Ask me to take pictures of any aspect of my life that you're interested in/curious about -- it can be anything from my favourite shirt, to my cell phone [ED: it can't actually be my cell phone, because I use that to take the pictures].

you heard it here first, folks. twitter is 2007's first web 2.0 breakout hit. as my semester ends, and my thoughts turn to fanfic, it's inevitable that I cook up some new absurd project. that's right, inspired by twitterfiction, I've created a twitter for tiny, tiny fanfic. this endeavor is request-based, so here it is, memeified:

Comment with a character or pairing, using an icon you'd like me to take as a prompt, and I'll reply with a nanofic of less than 140 characters. You can post as many requests as you like, but please make each in a separate comment.

Leaving a prompt incurs no obligation to participate yourself, but you're more than welcome to repost this if you so choose! Moreover, if you'd like to get your comment-responses onto twitter, you can:
a) email them to twitterfiction (twitterfiction[at]gmail.com)
b) start your own fanfictwitter! if you let projectjulie know, your entries can then appear in the collected feed: twitterfic
Formatting: when posting on twitter, precede your entry with the tag +[fandom] (e.g. "+BSG this is my story"). Note that this comes out of your 140-character allotment (sorry).

my fandoms could include any of these shows, Wicked, Harry Potter, Devil Wears Prada, probably most any movie with at least two women in it (it probably goes without saying: no boys allowed! excepting Captain Jacks). this call for prompts will remain open indefinitely, and likewise I make no promises about how quickly I'll fulfill them.

I emailed twitterfiction about this meme and haven't heard back yet. so I'm proceeding anyway -- will update if I get a yea or nay.

NB: jaiku is twitter's primary competitor. because you can include external feeds on your jaiku page, it's popular as a "lifestream" (see top user Leo Laporte or me for an example). jaiku also allows comments on individual updates and "channels" (jaikus to which multiple people can post). on the downside, jaiku currently doesn't allow you to specify a URL or other personal information -- in any case, the feature set of both these sites is likely to change/improve/converge rapidly. I'm using twitter here mostly because thus far it seems to have been more widely adopted generally/around these parts.

and after a holiday weekend of catchup, I've seen the top of my flist for the first time since, probably, february. HALLELUIA.

plus, I'm writing my remixthedrabble entries as twitter series, so I'll be indexing those here as well:

[ROUND 1] I wrote Love Yourself (The Large Sexual Database Remix) (BtVS) / trascendenza wrote me Socophilia (The Stop Motion Remix) (XF).
[ROUND 2] I wrote Caught in the Web (The Networked Remix) (X-Files+Matrix) / tinheart wrote me Inevitable (The Predestination Paradox Remix) (HP).
[ROUND 3] *skipped*
[ROUND 4] I wrote Penblwydd Hapus (The Birthday Cards Remix) (Torchwood) / trascendenza wrote me Leave This Behind (The Indivisible Remix) (BSG).

[BONUS] Four Things Laura Didn't Forget, and One She Did (BSG) for thearchive2's "microscopic" challenge.

i. I've fallen of the bottom of my flist a distressing number of times recently (never by more than a matter of hours). I think (hope) it's back under control for good now. but I missed some March posts, with no way of knowing which ones. *flails*

plus my web sites are down -- hopefully back up soon, hopefully with all files intact, long story. but this means my comments are bouncing at present, so if you've replied to me somewhere other than projectjulie in the past two days or so, give a holler.


ii. but there's a silver lining: mazily introduced me to the wonders of Firefox 2.0 -- particularly its ability to restore any number of tabs after quitting or crashing -- so my trademark Lost Tabs Crises, at least, are a thing of the past! I was a die-hard Safari holdout for years, but I tell you, Firefox 2.0 changed my life (_plasticity_ pointed out that lately I've been saying, "omg I just discovered something that changed my life!" on a regular basis; most of these somethings exist inside my computer). I'll never look back.

in this random screencap of a occasion when all the letters in my menus inexplicably turned upside-down, you can also see how pretty and PINK my Firefox is:


favorite extensions include del.icio.us complete (of the many del.icio.us tools, this seems to be the only one with support for multiple accounts), livejournal addons, the googlebar, and Zotero (thanks jennyo). holler if you have any tips to share, including Greasemonkey or Stylish scripts, which I haven't had much time to pick through (short of prettifying del.icio.us, which is a relief).

meanwhile, in another life-changing technological event, I've converted my public calendar to google. you can subscribe via google, iCal, or RSS. this is yet another way to keep track of me as I'm living bicoastally for the next two years.


iii. the Mary McDonnell obsession waxes and wanes in intensity, and perhaps it's better for all parties concerned if I just leave it be (in such public, publlished fora). she reported that she talked about *us* a lot in the EW interview, but nothing explicit made it through the edit; anyway, beerbad already pulled the most spectacular quote that only makes me crave Mary/Katee all the more.

meanwhile there are more pictures from our finale. and a friend asked me what my callsign is, and while I style myself more as Tory a civilian member of the presidential administration, I think the hypothetical answer is obvious [highlight: Cupcake]. want to suggest/guess?? I have decreed that _plasticity_'s callsign is Bookworm.


iv. pene and unwinding and I asked a question: Who are your single favorite TV characters of all time, male and female? female would be very difficult for me, with my excessive loves, except that there's Laura Roslin so it's obvious. and I thought male would be equally difficult for opposite reasons (I can barely even SEE boys on TV), except that there's Captain Jack (runners up = House, Richard Smith-Jones, and everyone on Arrested Development). I can totally see Captain Jack! (as I realized when I started gushing to jarrow [since it's flocked: you forgot (Captain) Jack Harkness, from Torchwood. I totally pick him! someone should start a Jackathon, seriously. and I mean that as a ficathon, but it's appropriate that it sounds so dirty... I can't imagine that you haven't *heard* about Torchwood, given the way fandom is. but in case you haven't: it's a Doctor Who spinoff run by the genius behind UK QAF, and every character is canonically bisexual. it's like the anti-BSG. I love it shamelessly. Captain Jack is totally omnisexual (he's from the future or something, my Whoverse knowledge is kinda spotty) and played by this totally gay actor who recently got gay married. you would LOVE this Jack... also he wears suspenders for no apparent reason! and is extremely talented at standing! and he's in love with Doctor Who, and keeps his severed hand in a jar (of course there is porn about this)! ...wow, I am sounding really not gay right now. the chicks rock too! they make out with aliens!]).


v. contrarily, can anyone explain SVU 8x16: On a Very Special SVU to me?!? it was as if they inserted a single episode of a serial drama from some crack-addled parallel universe into our regularly scheduled procedural! and I'm not even talking about the soapy sludge of emo that comprised the storyline -- my aversion to Olivia/Elliot aside, it just didn't make sense! the ep seemed to be referencing nonexistent events that happened before and afterward! there was no narrative closure! happyhop and I literally started the next one because we wanted to find out what happened, and lo and behold Olivia and Elliot are still inexplicably partners despite Cragen et al having just conclusively determined that this is a terrible idea! *flaily flail*


vi. oh, television. I really could talk endlessly about television (I watch it almost exclusively in bed on my iPod, these days -- I have a growing archive of seasons of stuff ripped if you want some). my catalogue (it got too long for links in the sidebar) will have to suffice for commentary. plus, randomly:

• R.I.P. Rome. not that I didn't love Atia, gratuitous toplessness, and many other things about this show, but apparently Servillia (or Servillia vs. Atia, at least) was the heart of my investment, because I couldn't bring myself to care much after she was gone.
• I watched Farscape season 1 again (mostly with my eyes closed, for which it turns out to be especially inappropriate, so I'm not sure what will become of my plan to continue until the bitter end). I'm finding Chiana much hotter this time around (no idea why). I'll NEVER get tired of the way Aeryn's leather creaks when she moves. but Zhaan is still my girl.
• the ensemble cast of child actors on Freaks & Geeks is stunningly talented. predictably, I want Lindsey/Kim slash.
• my mom (who, keep in mind, was the one who took me to Stratford every year as a child) and all her friends are watching Slings & Arrows, now! it's adorable. she forwards me emails like:

TWO YEARS in two days! ------------That's right: 2 years in 2 days: [person] and I sat down and watched the entire two year run of SLINGS AND ARROWS IN TWO DAYS! --and in the process we laughed until our sides ached (and sometimes teared up too). What a wonderful gift you gave us in the form of that recommendation. STOP RIGHT NOW AND PUSH THE FORWARD BUTTON, so that Julie will not only be witness to this note of thanks and praise, but will think to put us on our 'NOT TO BE MISSED LIST" of similar rare but wonderful entertainments.


vii. giantessmess is interviewing me for an article:

( gold star girlslasher )


viii. Photo Booth is dangerous for narcissists (like me).

( four pictures of me )

ix. I talk about Camp MCM all the time (our basement office, pictured above). but the the deliriously wacky collegiality that's spatialized there is just hard to describe. a video is worth a thousand words. late one night, poojapooja had an OCD moment and spontaneously decided to clean up my haircut using _plasticity_'s swiss army knife, and this activity was so patently absurd that we had to fire up the webcam:



this is, srsly, the worst YouTube video ever posted. except for how it's AWESOME. all evidence to the contrary, my own YT account is still quasi-professional, so I tricked poojapooja into posting it chez elle because it's just too incriminating in its utter banality (otherwise it would have ended up private, and that's no fun). also there were about four more minutes where we invented a new hairstyle and cackled a lot, but I accidentally erased the second file, so the world will never know the full extent of our genius.


x. exhibited here in some small measure is our favorite pastime: thinking up utterly frivolous theoretical rubrics. _plasticity_ came up with the concept of a "personal economy" -- basically the single currency through which all the input/output of one's life can be translated. we entertain ourselves by trying to figure them out for everyone we know. his is books. poojapooja's is treats. mine is girls(lash).

people do these fic roundups at the end of the year. well, mine is nearer the beginning of the next year and it's especially for tiny things (I made a shiny new BSG fic tag for the rest). it's tiny itself, since I'm foregoing the customary commentary.


( Seven Sins series )

( Classical Hollywood series )

round robins (group activities, organized by ME)

• Preoccupation (Battlestar Galactica)
• Girlslash on a Plane
• Sydney meetup


( my todo list )

and I say this perpetually, but I'm REALLY not supposed to add anything else to this list. unless what I'm adding is part of my DISSERTATION.


wishlist

and that's where YOU come in! I'm a firm believer in the efficiency of delegating my fanfic. and *hinthint* my birthday is coming up on march 19. if you're not committed enough to the cause to enlist on a volunteer basis, iamsab and I are going to have to institute a draft!

I have formerly provided you with a detailed list of THINGS I WANT, on the occasion of femslash_today's porn battle. I emphatically stand behind all those prompts (except perhaps Lost, to which I remain indifferent), and I believe they're still officially open in the porn/unporn continuing challenge. plus my drabble tag prompt is still outstanding: Grey's Anatomy : Addison/Izzie/Meredith/Christina : Sharp

I'd now like to add the following:

Global Frequency (unaired TV pilot which you must all watch), Zero/Aleph
political RPS, Hillary Clinton/Nancy Pelosi

plus selections from the projectUS co-brain:

Homicide, Juliana Cox/Kay Howard [currently assigned to tangleofthorns]
Traders (Canadian show), Sally Ross/Sonja Smits (character/actor dopplecest -- or really either of them doing anything slashy)
The Book Group (British show), Dirka/Fist (or really girlslash in any combination)

prompts available on request.

for the more ambitious among you, may I propose femslash100's Round the Clock challenge. iamsab has already signed up to write me all the Slings & Arrows girlslash in the world, but we're still seeking a brave cadet to take on all the Sarah Jane Smith girlslash in the world. inquire if interested.

and there you have it: my life in ficlets.

title: Snakes on the Brain, or, Girlslash on a Plane
authors: projectjulie, lonejaguar, heathers, and YOU
fandom: do you even have to ask?
pairing: Claire/the blonde one
rating: CRAAAAAAAACK
summary: sorry, but it had to be done.

( It was a dark and stormy flight. )

four score and seven years ago, I went to Australia to visit gorgeous girls. before I left, I loaded up four score and seven stories in tabs to peruse during the trip (mostly yuletide stuff). and lo, Safari didst crash, and more than ten days had passed so I couldn't even turn to the browser history for redemption.

I've been working on reconstructing that reading list for 6 months. (possibly I should be better medicated.) FINALLY, I've just about seen the top of my flist again. I'm within spitting distance of having read everyone's January, and I've gone back over everyone's yuletide recs. I am never, NEVER leaving the internet again *clings*! in the epoch I spent locked in heroic combat with the flist's 2-week cutoff, I was vanquished only once: I missed part of April 22 and slightly into April 23, so if you posted anything of importance in that window give me a holler.

I've been doing only the bare minimum of commenting, for which I apologize. that trend may have to continue. just know that I do read everything (like, obsessively).

this filtering thing. well, it clearly DID serve the purpose of enabling me to (barely) keep my head above water for the past 6 months. but it clearly DIDN'T serve its intended purpose of allowing me to sporadically read my entire flist. I haven't looked at the "sometimes" section since I made it, honestly. thus, I'm going to try to reintegrate it all. I'm going to try to figure out which ljs are really contributing to the crippling backlog, and let them go. this may, it pains me to say, result in some defriendings. it's purely out of dire necessity, and with my deepest apologies.

for example: much to my chagrin, I've had to give up ritaskeeter_. I mean, I'd already quit the rest of HP girlslash cold turkey because it's just too high volume. but oh, ritaskeeter_, you are TEH SEXXX0RZ! given the amount of fic listed below, though, it's just not plausible that I'll EVER have the time to catch up there (and those stories are too good to read without feedbacking). as for the rest, though, I remain committed. mostly the rest is BSG girlslash (and of course my baby femslash100, and now sisterwives) and stories by my friends -- I read a smattering of Grey's Anatomy, House, RPFS, Wicked, South of Nowhere, Veronica Mars, and occasional rare treats via femslash_today (SVU and Housewives I've gone off almost entirely), but those I rarely comment on. it's not a sustainable commitment, even so (it's the amount of fic that gets me so behind on lj, inevitably, not the number of friends), and I'm still not sure how to address that -- but I'm not at all ready to let go of my presence in and contribution to these communities and relationships, and I feel very strongly that feedback is the way one shows up.

( so, to do: )

everything else, I think, is NEARLY covered (let me know if I missed anything, OK?). and that's an accomplishment!

I just wrote this entire post and then xjournal crashed somehow without saving it. technology = angst and woe!!! reconstructing...

i. OK, so I utterly FAILED to finish my (going on three weeks late) getyourtoaster fic today (I succeeded in starting it, at least). hopefully thenewhope won't put me out the airlock! this failure may result, through a procrastinatory chain reaction of apocalyptic proportions, in me never finishing my PhD. because now the writing on the wall states that I'll work on the fic next week instead of starting my field lists for my exams, which means I won't start the field lists until, uh, late june? alternately, I could return to providence AGAIN after memorial day weekend on long island, quietly start the field lists without informing any of my oh-so-distracting friends (except the ones who read this journal or check plazes, apparently) that I'm in town, and then go straight from here to Laguardia to catch my plane to California. which is ridiculous, but perhaps not as ridiculous as not starting my field lists until late june. but would also mean that I won't get to meet with the brain trust Quorum of Five for GYT round Six, oh noes! this weekend, however, is dedicated to the birthday of clyde_man! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

ii. having the desire to write this story hanging over my head has been filling me with anxiety, I tell you (WHY, I ask, do I have to complete meaningless tasks like final projects and grading when I could be working on life-enriching fanfic?!?) -- and my unconscious has offered up the dreams to prove it:

( what would Freud say? )

iii. speaking of fanfic, those of you who watch Bad Girls MUST read mandysbitch's story Just Another Word. you don't need to know West Wing. it's an AU about Nikki, and it's spare and angst-ridden and lovely.

and while I'm here, a little SSP: I don't think enough people read my last ever Janeway fic. it's a pretty good story, imnsho. my take, finally, on J/7 post-DQ, with a guest appearance by Seska and a warning for non-con (I'm always so MEAN to Janeway!).

iv. and speaking of Bad Girls, do any of you still have interest in torrents of any portion of S.1-3 and/or my proposed Gay Girls S.2 Helen/Nikki compilation? the former is down because I some of the files were lost, and the latter is perpetually half done. I'd probably have to start over by re-ripping everything to move the project forward, and I'm not going to do that if your lives are all complete without it.

v. do you (uh, cathexys?) know any smart and fabulous person with a PhD who wants to come teach two TV studies classes at Brown next year? could be one each semester or both one semester; pay probably typical adjunct, not stellar. ideally said person could teach something other than what ljconscript and I primarily do (that is, not gender/sexuality and TV+digital/fandom; perhaps global TV, TV and race, TV history, reception studies) -- topics negotiable. I don't think they're posting the job officially, but I'm supposed to ask around.

i. sweet dreams and flying machines, cats and kittens, is the space fandoms femslash ficathon. basically like Multiverse, but girls only! I can't play, because I promised to be good, but I know YOU are going to have a great time. and even if you're not going to participate, please please pimp it asap if you know any of these people:

Babylon 5
Star Trek Voyager
Star Trek TNG
Battlestar Galactica (new series)
Firefly
Stargate SG-1
Stargate Atlantis
Star Wars
Star Trek DS9
Enterprise
Andromeda
Farscape
Dr Who
Blake's 7

also I should mention Thelma and Louise do Outer Space, the female friendship ficathon. "It's about the interplay between two friends, sisters, enemies, adversaries, accomplices or comrades." not really my thing, but might appeal to others.

eta: omg I forgot to say! like a little angel from on high, fickitten swept down and posted three excellent drabbles at the malingering drabble-a-thon (B -- which, I have no idea what the original and now deleted one was, so sad -- N and Z). which leaves only X (c'mon people, you know you can do it) and J (sorry heathers, I released it!). make my day??

ii. is there a canonical Secretary of Defense on The West Wing? specifically toward the end, post-CJ as Secretary of State (I seem to recall Fitz getting the SoD job earlier on, but then he died?). this is a vital detail in a supreme court case, so please help or tell me how to look it up (or if I should just make it up). (eta: and you call yourselves fangirls?! actually it would be circa the Zoe kidnapping, but anyway I think I'm going to use Fitz because he exists, even though actually he's the chairman of the joint chiefs.) which is to say, wingswing is turning into a rather elaborate project, and oddly political. but perhaps that's just what you get when you cross West Wing and BSG (and me)? I'm nervous and excited. anyway, mandysbitch will do her best ensure that it all makes sense and doesn't bore you. oh, and if you have any last names you want me to throw in as a shout-out (like your own), give me a holler. or good last names for terrorists.

iii. lesbians on House are teh r0xxx0rz!!! and apparently I need more shows -- although given the length of the list, I don't know how that's possible. it's just that House and Housewives are the only ones airing right now that I actually like.

iv. a glorious day, sunny and 70 -- why in tarnation did I spend it inside?? we're just hitting the height of the flowering trees, and now the tulips and bluebells are out. flonase is even working, it seems, because I haven't been having bad allergies! my favorite time of year is all too fleeting, and I'm trying to savor it. spring means I'm putting together all sorts of crazy, clownish outfits in layers, but my lack of a full-length mirror makes documenting them difficult. the best pic I've managed:



that's reflected in the window of the bus station downtown. wearing: red-and-white flower print pants, orange drape skirt from American Apparel, stylin' pink T that came from Sydney (with a long-sleeved shirt under it, not pictured), stripey cotton scarf that came from Spetses Greece, corduroy jacket from Delia's. I splurged on jewel-colored American Apparel bottoms in Atlanta because I am tragically WITHOUT PANTS. before AA, I had two pairs of workable yoga pants and no skirts in solid colors, and I mean, evidently I am doing this skirts-over-leggings thing all summer because the lone pink capri pants, which incidentally I wore in january, now no longer fit. wtf?!? I think also this summer I am going on a diet (like weight watchers or something) -- my first ever real diet. it's not that I expect or want to be skinny, I'd just prefer not to be gaining weight, whatever the explanation. I'd like to weigh 160 lbs and wear an honest size 12. much as I love Junior, my new pregnant-looking belly.

v. there's a longer post in this at some point, but in brief, I love my program. and the more I hear about the horrors of grad school from other folks, the more I cherish that. we're such a family, me and my sweet and supportive, smart and colorful peers. with a special shout-out to _plasticity_, my other half (we've worked out a division of labor whereby he does the work and I do the procrastination!) -- holla! and here's also M and E at the bar on friday, having this long, impassioned conversation about some avant garde film, like the tremendous nerds they are:



I showed them the picture, and they said "omg we look sooooo pretentious!" well, yeah ;P

since I'm here, I might as well do the photo meme again. tell me what you want me to post pictures of.

I'm going to have to accept, I think, that I'm not going to be "caught up" on lj until sometime this summer. by "caught up" I mean: having seen the top of the flist, read all the januaries, finished the list of back-fic and feedbacked all the rest, answered all my 2006 comments and written the posts below. of course, this "caught up" will only apply for about 15 seconds, since such is the nature of lj -- but it would be nice to experience those 15 seconds one day. meanwhile, one of those placeholder thingies for the posts I've been working on, but can't justify finishing while the more immediate processes of reading (days behind, again) and commenting (and ficathons) are barely under control:
- five love letters, which started in Vancouver a month ago, but I keep changing what the five actually are based on what's up in my life. probably I should write this first since I'd really like to tell you about Lisa Duggan's brilliant lecture relating the marriage equality campaign to the political economy of neoliberalism.
- the hypertext roundup updating you on all the ridiculous girlcrushes I've mentioned here in passing and then dropped, because inquiring minds want to know, right? [flocked]
- giant me-meme post (10 things I assume you know, 5 quirks and 5 AUs), started in what, december?

I'm here now, though, to say that I magically drew my #1 favorite minor character in the wingswing, and I'm SO EXCITED! and actually hugely intimidated by these women (the characters and also my fellow writers). am I allowed to tell who it is?? I need to consult with lawyerly types about what issues of constitutional law that at least sound plausible could conceivably come up if a lost human civilization suddenly showed up on earth. I'm very tempted to relate it to enemy combatants and habeus corpus, because it's so topical (this is what I woke up thinking this morning, btw), but if you-know-who and you-know-who are fighting over Boomer it may be hard to get them to make out. so I could also go with something about immigration/refugee status? so yes, research! not going to even think about starting this until after I write the getyourtoaster fic, which is still under discussion, so meanwhile I should catch up on classical Hollywood drabbles (It's A Wonderful Life and Blonde Venus/Voyager xover). I never did write the Weeds thing for remainder, so now it's a moot point until the end of the semester when I'm ready to post the index of everything I've written in the past 6 months (stay tuned). and oh, I also wanted to ask about structure, being that it's been literally YEARS since I started a real story (except the BSG five things, which has a built-in structure)... those of you who write more or less non-linear fics, how do you go about organizing them? do you make a plan before you start, or does it just happen? how do you know what will work?

and yeah, against my better judgement I'm also writing livewireless, which, dude? is the CRACK!

and speaking of crack, my birthday fic from giantessmess is the doppelcest xover OF D00M!! so much love.

and now I should think about showering and doing some homework???

apparently I have decided that, since I'm not getting any schoolwork done anyway, the appropriate course of action is to commit to writing a lot of girlslash. it remains to be seen whether this is a wise choice.

but goddamn it if I'm going to miss my chance to do the wingswing for once in my life! the best ficathon ever made. listen, west wing ladies, do it or I'll never forgive you.

so to review, on the agenda I've got:
• wingswing (due late april -- it's likely my story will be a wee bit late)
• 7 rounds of ficlets for getyourtoaster (monthly until October)
• drabbles for femslash100:
- classical Hollywood (only until the end of the semester, plus maybe The Birds which I still regret never having written)
- last two deadly sins (this weekend)
- maybe one for Trickster's Queen (Tamora Pierce), a fandom in which I also regret never having written
- and after that I really need to QUIT for a while!
• Helen/Nikki 5 somethings-or-other (hopefully I will be inspired when I finally watch S.3)

remind me that I'm not allowed to write anything ELSE, OK? perusing my todo list, I think I can semi-permanently abandon the SVU opus and delegate the X-Cops story to giantessmess. aeonian, perhaps we can port our epic to a getyourtoaster series/shared narrative universe? let's discuss. leaving only the first item (plus the distopian doppelcest erotica) -- and let me reiterate that I'd REALLY like to extricate myself from fanfic to some degree so I can write something to publish, already!!! these stories have been a goal for HOW long?? *shakes fist at fanfic*

Materials
• cheap notebooks and pens, one each per person
• common fandoms (we chose ones that were familiar to four of five of us, more or less, and did quick synopses of the intended pairing for the ignorant ones. we'd like to publicly apologize to Dana Scully for overlooking her!)
• a common first line [optional]
• a dry and secluded sitting place
• snacks

Instructions
• appoint a dictator timekeeper
• distribute notebooks, pens, and fandoms
• begin writing
• stop after perhaps four minutes, loosely interpreted
• pass the notebook to the next person, who will then begin writing on the next blank page
• read only the single previous entry, and then continue the story
• repeat until each notebook has returned to its original owner, who may then write a conclusion if necessary

the following stories were written by projectjulie, sparklebunny, giantessmess, pene, mandysbitch, and Mr. Twitters under the above conditions, and transcribed with only minor copyedits. any coherence in evidence below is purely accidental. 15 January 2006, Sydney Australia. there is photographic documentation:




Fandom: SVU (Oz)
Pairing: Alex/Olivia (Stabler/Beecher)
Rating: gratuitous buggery.

( In order to get some serious butt fucking action, she had to organize some serious butt fucking action. )


Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing: Buffy/Faith
Rating: dubious. with sex.

( Faith is, predictably, very good in bed. )


Fandom: Desperate Housewives (Melrose Place)
Pairing: Bree/Lynette, Lynette/Kimberly
Rating: CRACK

( Lynette was already half-dressed, and Bree marched in through her front door with so much purpose. Twice. )


Fandom: Bad Girls (Pretender)
Pairing: Helen/Nikki, Nikki/Miss Parker
Rating: so random.

( Nikki's cellmate was a strange woman. American, dancer's legs, eyes like ice. )


Fandom: The West Wing
Pairing: CJ/Mandy round robin of DOOM!
Rating: almost intelligible.
A/N: dedicated to gatefiction - queen of all things CJ/Mandy

( I don't want to be one of your White House conquests, CJ. )

i. so, uh, you really couldn't hear the cacophony on my last phonepost, huh? stupid noise-cancelling directional mics! you'll just have to take my word for it. I lost the $20 I'd won, though my bro also turned 15 cents into $12. and I hit for another $6 on the penny machine. all in all, we ended up down about $6, which isn't bad for a day of gambling. um, the family pastime is sort of growing on me.

ii. my cousin's fourth grade class is doing the best project ever: they each picked a stuffed animal who they sent off to travel the world with willing volunteers. said volunteers will send postcards back to the class and make entries in a journal. in this way, they will learn geography. so I've inherited a travel buddy named Mr. Twitters, a small white bunny who is metrosexual, we determined, because he wears a pink ribbon. see photos chronicling his adventures @ http://flickr.com/photos/bunnylog

iii. sent: 105 holiday cards, not including ~8 joint ones that clyde wrote and 10 I had to scrap because I couldn't get any address at all. certain of the addresses I tried were long shots, too, so I imagine some will come back to me. recipients include: mandysbitch, heathers+lonejaguar, eighthblackbird, happyhop, n0r1_h, iamsab+sorlklewis, pene, sscheckter, surblimity, boxmint, myalexandria, ibrakoor, warlordkittens, zazuomgwtf (I forgot to look up your postal code! hope it finds you anyway), boydyke+vegasgrrl24, celeria, mazily, sparklebunny, cabenson, museumfreak, thatfangirl, giantessmess, sinful_ceasar, chyryan_blog, bechover_blog, and tibbers (who, as far as I can tell, is an entirely random person who happened to stumble across my request for addresses) -- should be everyone who asked.

celeria takes the prize for the best card I received. handmade! personalized! TICKY BOXES!

iv. I need a drabble idea. I've decided I should write for my seven deadly sins challenges at femslash100 -- though it's not clear WHEN this writing is going to happen. six must be completed by monday for remainder. I'm planning:

#44 ~ gluttony - Starbuck/Roslin + a cucumber
#45 ~ pride
#46 ~ wrath - Wicked, Elphaba/Dorothy
#47 ~ envy - CJ/Kate/Abbey, after the wedding
#48 ~ sloth - Weeds, Nancy/her lawyer (name?)
#49 ~ greed - Neuromancer, Molly/3jane
#51 ~ lust - Helen/Nikki

so as you see, I've got nothing for Pride. any requests? I don't know if I can actually manage Lou/Annabeth. trying to come up with something rare, but I don't know if any of it is clear enough in my mind, and I don't have time for research. I could default to The Birds, because when I was watching it I thought "wow, this is slashy," and I try to follow through on such thoughts on principle. or possibly I should attempt Mary Poppins or Jean Brodie, both of whom are prideful.

v. eighthblackbird, I'm giving NeoOffice the old college try -- I organized the toolbars so they're livable and I'm willing to overlook the ugly grey interface. but there is no word count feature whatsoever! MS Word keeps a running tally in the status bar, which is crucial to me with all the drabbling. so I think it's a no-go, and I'm doomed to worship the evil empire forever. plus, it keeps trying to get me to save things in its weird format rather than .doc, which isn't going to work if I have to communicate with the population at large.

vi. holiday ficathons! so much tasty goodness and so little time in which to savor it. I'll read all your stories, of course, and many of you are reccing as well, which I appreciate. but given my predilections what I'm most excited about is femslash_today's yuletide femslash masterlist! I'll certainly be getting to all of those... eventually.

vii. in preparation for my adventure, I went back and read the emails I wrote in august 1999, the last time I went to australia. didn't find much info about what I actually did as a tourist, but that era in my life rushed back with startling vividness -- its cacophonous emotions and palpable riot of growth. stories of four different lovers happening roughly simultaneously (five if you count the still-vibrant correspondence with my FL), and I'd forgotten they happened all at once. about the trip, I wrote:

"So Australia. Australia is mind-blowing. It is more like the US than any other country I have ever been in except for Canada. Which only makes the differences, and there are many, stand out and chafe me with how little I understand them. It is so new and weird and post-colonial--still not independent from Britain, in fact. I am focusing on the language right now--the fact that I can understand every word doesn't make it any more strange to be surrounded by a totally different way of talking, and being marked as foreign every time I open my mouth (and only then) is interesting. I'm obsessed with the accent. Morocco [where I had just completed a semester abroad] totally changed my way of being a tourist, and I would rather be doing informal fieldwork than going to museums and sterile wildlife parks and historic buildings. The family activities have been rather tame. But I am having fun with them just the same."

and I'm hovering around xmas on the flist, oy -- I'll catch up before I leave for Oz on thursday, I promise...

I was all technologically inspired by my discussions with new media folks yesterday. does anyone want to go in on a TXTmob with me? it's basically the same as a yahoogroup-like email list, but using txt messages to/from your phone rather than emails. we could use it just to chat or for some particular purpose (ideas? fandom??). we could dump the messages into an lj to archive them (or not). I suppose I don't have any particular goal in mind (yet), but I'm interested in experiencing the system. alternately, does anybody belong to any TXTmobs that I might like to join? (the reason that I don't txt more is that the interface on my cellie is awful -- sending pix is much less hassle.)

MT was also telling us about collaboratively authoring his forthcoming book. they used a wiki, and he says "in the end I couldn't point to a single paragraph and say whether she or I wrote it." I've never written collaboratively, but I've always been fascinated by the phenomenon (I like to imagine Deleuze and Guattari sitting at a desk together, cackling maniacally). those of you who collaborate: how does it work? I've heard reports of a certain division of labor: one person writes the plot, another the smut, for example. or there's round-robin style -- like this comment porn I read today, and on a grander scale in RPGs (as far as I understand them). do any of you have ways to intertwine even further? (I'm wildly curious about the mind-melding MO of punkensab)

more importantly, would anybody be interested in participating in an experimental collaborative-fanfic-authoring wiki?? has this or anything like it ever been done before? I don't know how realistic this is, considering how little time I have to write -- but part of me wonders if I'd write more if I were posting/contributing bits and pieces of things, without the pressure of producing finished works (even drabbles). I envision running MediaWIki (unless somebody has a better idea -- it looks pretty easy to install), with pages categorized by contributing author, fandom/pairing, finished/WIP/stub/bunny (etc.) for easy indexing. fics that were declared finished (there would have to be some protocol for this -- perhaps a parallel lj comm, since wikis aren't a good architecture for discussion) could be posted elsewhere too, with all non-anonymous authors credited (though a prerequisite for this process would of course be a less-than-robust investment in one's own author-function -- I suppose the first page would have to be ground rules). is this just another one of my pipe dreams? I don't want to set it up unless 5 or 10 people are interested in playing with it (but this doesn't mean you have to write with me -- you could invite whoever you like to write whatever you like).

*

and LJ/fandom/miscellany:

• G is writing a brilliant psychoanalytic paper about representations of female masochism in film, and we all want to help her out, right? she's including Secretary (yay!) and some weird French movie about a girl who cuts herself. is there anything else? I seem to recall that when Secretary came out, there was much discussion of an earlier (80's?) film about a kinky couple -- I even watched it, but I can't remember the name or anything else about it. it was not a very positive portrayal: the relationship was creepy and sort of abusive. what was it?? I believe I was thinking of 9+1/2 Weeks -- thanks aqua_blurr!

• wallowing in South of Nowhere has me happier than a pig in shit. I picked _southofnowhere out fairly randomly from among several fan comms. no new ep yet, but the promos (vid and stills seen there) are PORN *drools* -- also joined southof_fic and spencerashley (Spashley! *squishes*). icon from _sonicons, and media (redundantly) from southof_eps.

• SVU is really so tiresome. Casey and Liz were soooooo slashy and I could only go "euw! euw!" -- I may have finally found the pairing that is too wrong even for me (though I think I have asked quasiradiant to write it in the past -- somehow it's not as squicky without the visual) O.o

• in solidarity with the boyslashers among you, I capped the recent GAY on Nip/Tuck. this show is so gay that it has to actually poke fun at its own gayness! and speaking of gayness, who wants to write me Lynette/Nina, huh? -- it must be done.

• 100 icons! and I adore each and every one. whatever shall I do?? it's the multifannishness that kills me -- there are now 13 TV shows (Bad Girls, Battlestar Galactica, Desperate Housewives, The L Word, SVU, X-Files, CSI, Farscape, The O.C., South of Nowhere, Weeds, Voyager, West Wing) and 5 other fandoms (Harry Potter, D.E.B.S., Wicked, Avenue Q, Mary Poppins, Olsens) represented among my icons, oy -- and of course that's not even comprehensive.

• buy this!! New York based Graphic Designer Matthew Powell and Photographer Matthew Baker are pleased to announce the release of their new collaborative project, Bedside Companions, a sexy 2006 pin-up calendar benefiting God's Love We Deliver and GMHC. Inspired by the work of 1940's pin-up artists, the calendar's theme captures the coy sensuality of yesteryear, though instead of pin-up girls, they've updated the style using fourteen drag queens…and added in a message promoting the fact that safer sex is really sexy. (via girlynyc2000)

1. current notes for my online identity/community lecture:
it's coming after a week on surveillance, where we'll be discussing Foucault's panopticon, Virilio's doomsday scenarios, and the pathology of camgirls. so my plan is to begin with a critique of the pessimism of these perspectives, which identify important phenomena but color them with regressive clutching at disintegrated stabilities like "real," "private," etc. I do want to assign Cyborg Manifesto, though it's not related directly to the topic at hand, because I adore it and I want the kids to read it. so I'll then outline the article as an alternative politics that proposes new possibilities for agency and connection/affinity from within a system of publicity and surveillance. via a nod to the broader field of cyborg theory, I'll segue (possibly using museumfreak's "we're all cyborgs here" icon, if she doesn't mind) to the ways online identity/community in particular can be understood through this lens. I'm not sure how good my summary of this will be since I don't know any of this material -- help/references would be appreciated. I'll take livejournal as a sort of case study, possibly walking them through BSG fandom as an example of the forms of centralized/decentralized networking and community that this technological architecture can provide a platform for (with the bonus of canonical cyborgs). since in the following class we'll be looking at some of the erasures and breakdowns of this model (e.g. wank, racism), I may close by touching on some of the ways that lj is far from utopian (e.g. ljdrama).

I don't have to assign them a second article, but if you can think of one that would complement Haraway, but is perhaps more specific to online community/livejournal, I'd be much obliged. my one stipulation is that it be critical theory rather than social science/ethnography oriented (i.e. not like this article) -- I think this work can be tremendously interesting and useful, but it isn't disciplinarily appropriate to the class. I'm planning to look through these at some point for fodder, but I'm not optimistic. (and I was poking around delicious, and noticed that ao, femslash, and svu are among the few tags listed as related to livejournal -- HEE!)

alternately, I could give the students various non-academic articles/meta/sites -- and this, dear flist, is mostly what I'm here to beg for your suggestions about, in your far vaster wisdom and experience. do you have links for me, pretty please? actually, in going through my memories, I found a whole bunch -- but I'd welcome more or just your input on how you'd frame this. there's plenty of material about the LJ/Six Apart merger, but I think I'd rather go in the direction of collective practices rather than of the question of how they interface with an techno-economic system. I could discuss Bloggers Need Not Apply but that's more about identity/privacy and not community. musings about lj by fans / how lj has changed fandom could make up a big part of it -- yet again I owe a great debt to cathexys for being such an intrepid archivist. coffeejunkii, do you still have the list of links you gave your students? -- I lost them. this isn't a lecture about fandom, though -- it takes up lj and specifically fandom as one permutation of the topic of online identity/community.

2. I was admonished for not blogging legs and eggs. hello, my name is projectjulie, and I LOVE STRIPPERS. also, the 3 first-year girls, who were excellent sports -- if not quite as deliriously drooling as I. the breakfast buffet left much to be desired, but was more than made up for by the legs portion of the event. (except for one, who wouldn't even look at us) the strippers were all totally sweet and HOT and got a kick out of us being there. our favorite insisted, with delightful enthusiasm, on going down the line and rubbing her breasts over each of our faces. bliss! and the conversations were fascinating -- one stripper said that most women who come in are scoping out a potential workplace or dragged in by men and tend not to engage, but another said that women customers are more able to have fun and interact (vs. the men who just sit there all stoic and predatory).

3. I wrote Cainslash (which is spoilery for Battlestar Galactica 2x10). why can't I just write fic all the time?? I have so many drabble ideas that I don't know what to do with myself. I cooked up an alphabet soup challenge so I can live vicariously through others -- any and all pimpage would be much appreciated. and aeonian is my WHORE at ficsforcharity, which leaves me just beside myself with joy. I'm all about the delegation of kinks and bunnies, yes.*

4. and now I bring you a mid-semester update on my TV-viewing habits -- because after all, TV is my LIFE. now with LJ communities!

the lineup
• dear lord, Bad Girls! I rather hate that I (and my ilk) are so predictable, but I was instantly head over heels for it. lesbians in prison = GUH TO THE NTH POWER. ergo I have adopted this popular sparklebunny icon, which is apropos. if you like dykes, run, don't walk, to netflix or tvtorrents or digital cable -- I'll bet you favors of your choice that you'll be hooked after approximately 2 eps.** if you're a girlslash writer, consider watching it to be a personal favor to me. so yes, I'm joining the mass exodus from SVU to badgirlsslash (fic) and the_pottingshed (drabbles) -- and I should really catch up on your writings there! (there's also badgirls_tv, but I'm concerned about spoilers, as the brits are up to season 7 -- don't spoil me!!)
• speaking of the devil, I'm pretty zen about the state of SVU.*** is it just me, or did Olivia's hair get rather shorter in the second ep and then go all shaggy again? the shorter I thought was bearable. meanwhile, the snarky meta (thank you, ob_fangrrl!) makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. and it was always a crap show whose primary pleasure beyond eye candy consisted in deconstructing its reactionary sexual politics, and that hasn't changed (count on svu_cort, though it's been quiet of late). mini rant: I love how gay men's sexuality is TV-friendly because it can be spectacularized as dangerous, edgy, and criminal, whereas lesbian sexuality is all about womyn rubbing gently up against one another in a frenzy of nurturing female bonding, and thus is clearly an inappropriate subject for TV drama. *fumes* I'm subbed to (and sporadically reading) svu100, lawandorderfic, casey_olivia (I'm unapologetic), and svu_rpf for fic, and taking over olivia_mariska_ is a pet project.
• ( and the rest )

so *this* is my last post before I leave, scouts honor. I'm really supposed to be finishing up some things at the moment. but,

1. when I was having dinner with sebsan8 last week, discussing the rather ambitious number of fic projects I've taken on this summer, I decided to take a Pledge. I shall call it the NO MORE BUNNIES Pledge. plot bunnies, that is. because, while it is all well and good that I've made writing fanfic my priority for these rare months of vacation, life probably shouldn't (and indeed, can't) continue like this. at some point in the not too distant future I should really make getting some papers revised and published my main project, or starting on my fields, or even writing original fic. but I keep coming up with new and irresistible ideas. I simply must put a stop to this. and this is not entirely implausible, as I was already on fandom hiatus once before, for several years. so other than the stories on my list for this summer (6), and the ones already on my long term to-do list, I hereby pledge that I will not commit to any more fanfic projects of longer than drabble length.

( deliver me from temptation )

2. more kayaking pictures! if you are living in or visiting nyc, you seriously must go kayaking this summer. it's FREE! here's the official information (I've only been to the pier 26 location, not 72nd st.). things to know:

• yeah, it sounds lame, only being out for 20 min. and having to stay in the protected area. but the protected area really isn't that small. and you can always go more than once if the line isn't too long. it's really really fun!
• you will be sitting in a pool of water, so bring dry bottoms and wear/bring shoes that can get wet. you'll also want to bring a lock so you can leave your stuff in a locker. remember to wear sunscreen and bring water to drink.
• I recommend leaving time to get a bbq burger afterwards at pier 25 -- which also features mini golf, bike rentals, and batting cages (none of which are free, alas). it's also near the lovely battery park.

3. yet again, I wish I were Canadian. that's via Tristan. who also informs me that 36C and 34D bra sizes are identical -- does this make any sense to you?? she says VIctoria's Secret told her, and I guess they should know. eta: isilya says it's true! "A quick explanation: cup sizes go down as rib sizes go up. A 32D, a 34C, and a 36B all have the same cup size, but the rib (or "band") sizes are very different. This means, for example, that all those cup sizes will have diameters of 5 inches, but that the rib sizes and shoulder straps will greatly vary." she recommends wearing the largest cup size (and hence smallest rib size) that fits for best support. also, while I'm here, don't you want to be one of the cool kids?

4. went on a highly productive online shopping spree for clyde_man's birthday/father's day/general appreciation presents yesterday, woohoo! got ( cut because even though s/he was consulted about all of these, s/he now forgets what I ordered and wants to be surprised ) hurrah! clyde pays the rent, buys the groceries, cooks, and cleans the house, and I do the dishes and laundry -- pretty good deal, no?

5. I had a dream that mandysbitch, mazily, michellek and I were all hanging out. each of us was coincidentally wearing something rainbow-colored, and I was excited to take a picture of us with my cameraphone and blog it :)

also, ( the book meme )